First written on 15/07/2023
Growing up, I used to dislike anything related to computers or the internet. This wasn't because there weren't any computers around or the internet wasn't popular, no. I was born in the 2000's, which makes me a "digital native zoomer". I'm not exactly sure what factors influenced me to be far away from technology, perhaps the way I was brought up. I wasn't super interested in gaming and I didn't own much gadgets. In middleschool, I had a Nokia phone which I would ocassionally use to play snake. At the same time, most of my friends would walk around wielding iphones and ipads. It wasn't until somewhere in the beginning of highschool til I got my first smartphone, started using social media and began taking gaming as seriously as everyone else. I recall owning a PC prior to that, although I wasn't so hyped about it.
Attending ICT class at school was only fun when they allowed us to play games. As I mentioned above, I wasn't super interested in gaming for a long time, but the once-a-week hour of playing PvZ or Minecraft with your buddies was something everyone looked forward to. Apart from that, ICT class would teach us to type and use Microsoft office. That's mostly what we did throughout middleschool and even the first years of highschool. It's impossible to make computing more boring than that.
Around grade 10, during one of our ICT classess, our teacher taught us how to write HTML. That was probably one of the most influential classes I ever had. Realising that you could type these funny strings of text into an editor and have it turn into a webpage was mind blowing. I wanted to go beyond that, so I dedicated myself to learning a programming language. I was also motivated by the fact that a couple of my friends were learning programming too, so having someone to share your ideas with was very valuable.
In a few years time, I was able to write intermediate-level C code, debug assembly files and mess with javascript. That is not including being obsessed with learning a new scripting language every now and then, only to write some basic stuff and then give up completely. Overall, I made a couple useful pieces of software, but in general, I was more eager to learn about software than to write it.
Eventually I became interested in messing with operating systems. After lots of time and effort, I managed to put FreeDOS on an old machine. Following more dedicated time and effort, I figured my way around Linux. This Sqwok post captures my first time of successfully installing Debian in a virtual machine. It felt like something insanely advanced back then.
Over time, I also became a much more active user of the internet. Apart from consuming memes and youtube videos, I was also interested in learning about web technologies. I found my way on Reddit, and later became interested in websites similar to Reddit, or the so called Reddit Alternatives. I was also actively reading blog posts about internet anonymity, privacy and rebelling against big tech. I was even able to suppress my gaming needs with all of these new hobbies that I found. A user who downloaded and reviewed my Reddit posting data told me that there wasn't anything interesting about my Reddit account, only a lot of Minecraft posts, then a period of inactivity followed by posts about Reddit alternatives.
That is how I evolved from being distanced from technology into being able to program computers, install Linux, talk shit about Microsoft on obscure corners of the internet and ready to give lectures on why gmail is bad and why everyone should run their own XMPP server.
I stopped writing code at some point. Making software to solve trivial problems became boring and writing something complex was too hard. I felt like I learnt all that I wanted to learn about software and was just happy enough to have that knowledge floating around somehwere in my head. I was still thinking about writing code every now and then though. I would wake up and think "Today I will start a new project"...except that I had no idea what that project even was.
After writing software became boring, I found fun in learning about other people's creations, especially free software and Linux. By saying "learning" though, I mean reading comment threads online and then maybe installing something onto my computer. Distrohopping was another thing I was into. Eventually though, putting Linux on a machine became less of a challenge and more of a routine.
Researching about internet privacy became daunting. Being a Microsoft-hating, Google-avoiding Linux enthusiast takes a certain amount of effort. Avoiding something that is literally everywhere is by definition not easy. Booting your machine in public and having to explain to people that your computer isn't broken and that the white on black text is normal becomes annoying eventually.
The internet became getting on my nerves and I went offline for a while. There was another important thing that changed my life - I started going to college. This meant that I would be using Windows in order to be compatible with whatever software we use in class, having a Google account because that's what shapes my university's digital presence and using Facebook to communicate with people.
Over time, I learnt an important thing - big tech are people too. I used to have a lot of hate for Facebook, Google, Microsoft and Reddit for no apparent reason. I think this is because smart people online critisize big tech by writing long blog posts and other people just follow along. In reality, whatever big tech's real incentives are, they make our life a whole lot easier. Yeah, they show you ads and steal your data, but what is the real alternative? Will everyone eventually host their own mail server? Big tech has it's flaws, but joining the fight meant making sacrifices I wasn't willing to make.
I don't regret learning Linux or researching about technology. There is a lot of useful knowledge that I gained in the process. I wouldn't be able to host this website otherwise. I found a lot of fun in computing, but that fun eventually faded.
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